MTV show: All about the party, not the prizes

It was just five years ago, at MTV’s Video Music Awards in 2003, that Britney Spears and Madonna closed their duet performance with a passionate lip-lock.

My, how time flies.

That’s the sort of thing that MTV counts on to give its annual awards show “news” value; otherwise, there’s nothing much going on that even resembles a traditional showbiz trophy parade.

With quirky Russell Brand (“Forgetting Sarah Marshall”) hosting tonight’s program, live from Los Angeles, there’s bound to be a few indiscretions and prearranged foul-ups, and enough flying profanities to have the censors pounding their seven-second delay bleep buttons over and over.

Van Toffler, president of MTV, said of Brand: “We already know he’s sought advice from some of his British colleagues, like Amy Winehouse, about how to behave in public.”

The show will offer a wide cross-section of today’s hot and sometimes controversial young stars. Among the presenters: Lindsay Lohan, Kanye West, Miley Cyrus and even Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps.

And Madonna. And Spears, provided she can get to the theater without running over somebody’s foot, stopping at a bar or engaging in some other career-crushing activity.

Pink, Rihanna, T.I., Kid Rock, Lil Wayne and the Jonas Brothers are scheduled to perform, among others.

The irony is that MTV hasn’t been a music video network for years, and hardly (if ever) actually plays any of these videos.

But that’s not the point.

The nominees in major categories are:

VIDEO OF THE YEAR

Britney Spears, “Piece of Me”; Jonas Brothers, “Burnin Up”; Chris Brown, “Forever”; Pussycat Dolls, “When I Grow Up”; Ting Tings, “Shut Up and Let Me Go.”

BEST ROCK VIDEO

Parramore, “crushcrushcrush”; Slipknot, “Psychosocial”; Linkin Park, “Shadow of the Day”; Foo Fighters, “The Pretender”; Fall Out Boy, “Beat It.”

BEST DANCING IN A VIDEO

Chris Brown, “Forever”; Danity Kane, “Damaged”; Madonna, “4 Minutes”; Ne-Yo, “Closer”; Pussycat Dolls, “When I Grow Up.”

BEST HIP HOP VIDEO

Mary J. Blige, “Just Fine”; Lupe Fiasco, “Superstar”; Flo Rida, “Low”; Lil Wayne, “Lollipop”; Kanye West, Homecoming.”

BEST POP VIDEO

Danity Kane, “Damaged”; Jonas Brothers, “Burnin Up”; Panic at the Disco, “Nine in the Afternoon”; Britney Spears, “Piece of Me”; Tokio Hotel, “Ready, Set, Go!”